Goodbye

Last we met was few weeks ago. Masa my little brother's wedding reception dekat Muar.

Dia macam biasa, hadir walaupun sedikit lewat. Ada majlis di KL katanya. Berbaju hijau muda, bersulam nama sendiri di pocket baju. He's wearing the same design last week with different color. Hihi.

He came and duduk di meja sambil makan. Dia panggil my husband duduk sekali. I know he likes my husband. Because he hardly panggil mana-mana anak buah duduk semeja and offer cigarettes. My husband politely declined. That was because our Paklong and Maklong pun ada duduk sekali. Kami ( Tok Taza and his wife, anak-anak dia, Paklong, Maklong, Me and Husband) bersembang banyak cerita. It was very entertaining tengok dia gurau-gurau dengan isteri dia, and dia bercerita things about him that we don't know and unsure before. It's like getting-to-know-more-session for us.

A week before during reception di KL, I appointed his baju and said;

" Woah Tok! Cantiknya baju, siap ada nama!"

And he said,

" Ala, ni outdated punya collection. My new one coming soon "

And he giggled.

Yes.

Thru enough.

His new collection ialah kain kapan yang beliau pakai on his very last day. It was last week, Thursday Dec 4th, 2014. A day before, nenek call and bilang Tok Taza masuk ICU, sakit jantung and stroke.

I was shocked. My mom was shocked. Everyone was shocked.

 Sebab rasa macam baru sangat jumpa dia, and he was all healthy and cheerful. What can I tell you, he is one handsome and kind man. Ini betul handsome, bukan sebab he's my datuk saudara. Bukan. He's tall, kulit putih kemerah-merah and very charismatic. And I like him. Much. Very much. Kalau masa I kecil, rumah dia di Melaka yang I very looking forward nak pergi.

Because he gave lots of duit raya and makan rumah dia sedap.

My mom pun kalut nak pergi melawat dan jumpa pakcik dia.

So we decided untuk melawat dia di Putra Medica Specialist, Melaka on the next day. Honestly, I tak rasa apa pun masa nak pergi melawat dia. I mean, by the time kami arrive I hope dia akan sedar dari coma. So that we can chat with him, make him smile and have a good time in Melaka. Yes. I siap plan nak bawa my mom makan asam pedas Hajjah Mona dan coconut shake afterwards.

Bila kami sampai, still tak boleh masuk. He was in CCU. After a while, doctor panggil immediate family members. So I nampak Nek Nomi (his wife) bergegas masuk. Tak lama lepas tu, semua orang masuk and I thought;

" Oh, Tok dah sedar agaknya "

And bila sampai kat katil dia, I nampak Nek Nomi terduduk sambil nangis and tunjuk ke arah Tok Taza. Anak-anak dia, my Nenek ( Arwah's Kakak) and my mom datang dekat katil and nangis. I nampak monitor tepi katil but I don't know how to read. I nampak Tok Taza terbaring atas katil dengan bantuan oxygen.

I sedih. I sedih tengok dia macam tu. I sedih tengok everyone nangis. I cried a bit, I cried because I rasa suasana tu sedih and I sedih Tok Taza tak sedar dari coma lagi. My husband came and hugged me. But silly me, I thought semua orang sedih sebab he still coma. Until I nampak the monitor went blank.

And then I terdengar anak dia cakap dengan the nurse yang mereka nak bawa balik Tok cepat.

So I asked my husband;

" Tok dah tak ada ke? "

" Iya b, b baru perasan ke? "

I tak tahu nak describe apa yang I rasa. Tapi I rasa such a big lost. What came in my mind was;

Raya and any event after this won't be the same because he no longer around.


Alhamdulillah, urusan pengebumian Arwah berjalan dengan sangat lancar. Ramai orang datang and pay him very last respect. I know Arwah memang sangat dikenali ramai dan ada ramai kenalan dan family yang sayangkan beliau.

I'm happy that we decided to visit him, I'm happy that we spent whole day in Melaka dan bersama beliau dalam perjalanan akhir beliau. I'm happy that dia sempat datang to my wedding and having him around dalam event-event penting dalam hidup I was such a bless.

Alfatihah, Tok Taza.

Insyaallah, we'll meet again someday.


Allahyarham Tuan Haji Mustadza bin Abu Bakar
26 Jan 1955 - 4th Dec 2014

Innalillah.